Community Organizers

Can’t help posting this, it’s just Gold!

Flashback — Halloween 2001

The Disclaimer Post

Disclaimer:

I have this bad feeling that people begin to worry about me when I write a sad or frustrated post. Please don’t. My days aren’t filled with those emotions, but they do come and I find that writing and sharing about them helps me. It might seem strange to many to take the deepest feelings of sadness and put them on -line, but it’s just part of my process.
I guess I just want those who don’t see me everyday or interact with me me everyday to understand that I sometimes write about the lowest points. Just as I sometimes write about the highest points. I’m trying to get better about also writing about the day to day, but that often feels just too mundane. But then again, what’s really mundane on the internet.

For those interested, I did not east breakfast today.

(this was originally going to be a much longer post with lots of other sections, but since I can’t get my act together to write at the moment all you get is the disclaimer. More later)

My Half Marathon Video

Just in case there was any doubt, I’m totally nuts. Last week I ran my fourth 1/2 marathon in Hartford. And to add to the craziness, I brought along my new Flip Mino and filmed a mot of the marathon. Yup, that’s right, I brought a video camera with me and filmed while running a 1/2 marathon. I think this makes a “hardcore documentalist”.

The idea came to me while running The Deadwood- Mickelson Trail 1/2 marathon in SD in June. The scenery was so great and the experience of having fans cheering for you so awesome, I wanted to capture it from my perspective. The Flip Mino weighs just a couple of ounces and fits right into my hand or the little pocket in my shorts. I think it’s lighter and smaller than my iPod.
I got lots of strange looks as I filmed the crowds or myself, but it was fun and I’m glad I did it. below is a much abbreviated version of the 1/2 marathon.

Though this was my slowest 1/2 marathon it was actually the most enjoyable because I felt good. No troubles with my hips or my belly.

Waiting for the mail

photo courtesy of  flickr @cindy47452

For a large portion of my life, I thought my father just waited for the mail.  He would sit in his office upstairs for most of the day and then when the mail truck/car would come he’d light up and head down the stairs to get the mail.  

As I got older I figured out that he was learning systems, doing development work and instruction design.  The kind of work that had to be done if you were going to teach a class on something totally new or the same 6 weeks class you’d taught for years.

So why am I writing about this. Well I was just sitting here at my computer doing some work and I heard the the mail truck go by. I felt like one of Pavlov’s dogs because I instantly wanted to get up and meander to the mail box.

For many years I’ve said I wanted my dad’s job by the time I was 38. I sincerely wanted to sit and wait for the mail. 

Maybe I’m finally there.

I’m voting for Michael Palin

The Season of Firsts

For the most part, I’d say I’m doing pretty well handling the loss of my father. It’s not like it’s easy, but I’m trying to be honest with myself about my grief. Some stuff catches me off guard and causes weird overly harsh reactions. But, I can usually catch myself and acknowledge where the reaction is really coming from.
This past weekend Robert participated in a Columbus Day soccer tournament. While at the tournament Don commented on seeing so many grandparents at the games. I nonchalantly said that my dad was the grandparent who did that stuff. However during the same car ride when he mentioned Thanksgiving, I became extremely tense and said “Let’s just have Subways and pretend it’s not happening. Or hope someone invites us somewhere.” I didn’t want to have that conversation.
As everyone enters the Holiday season, we also enter our “Season of Firsts”. First Halloween, First Thanksgiving, First Christmas Eve, First Christmas and First New Year’s.

Even as I write this I start to cry. (Pausing to let emotions pass).

It’s hard to envision these days.

There are so many withouts:

• without my dad’s roasted parsnips and potatoes.
• without his homemade crusty french bread.
• without his general crotchidy/grumpyness
• without traditional Thanksgiving Cioppino.
• without warm Black Label.

(and those are just the first Thanksgiving ones that come to mind. Don’t get me started on Christmas yet).

How I’ll cope is yet unknown, but this begins the process.

Luckily for all of us, we have two highly demanding small people to break the omnipresent sadness that looms when you think about withouts.

Kids will have none of that self-centered mopping.

Other people’s business

It’s hard to not share other people’s business on your blog and the truth is that other people deserve their privacy. I know that my blog is my space to talk about my stuff, but it’s hard to not talk about other people’s lives as their lives directly impact mine.

Curse you slippery slope!

There’s been some pretty chilling news coming through to me via email and phones. Nope, not economic drama way more serious.

I have to say that it just sucks. My heart is bleeding for so many close friends who are facing the toughest times. I believe the saying goes, that we only get as much as we can handle. Of course, I know the best most resilient people in the world and they’ keep getting smacked around.

My happiest of thoughts are with you all.

They say you can never go home again

I have been meaning to blog for awhile now, but I have actually been busy and when not actually busy I have been goofing off. Seems to me to be a healthier diet than I was consuming before which was about 100% goofing off.

The Employment Scene

Let’s see I’ve been back teaching for about three weeks now. Hard to believe that’s it’s already been three weeks. At first i was somewhat upset about being back at a job that i did 7 years ago, my tune has changed greatly. I’m remembering how great it is to be in the classroom with students and how much of a tangible difference these classes can make in their lives. It’s not easy work given the nature of my students. They’re trying to fit ESL classes into their already tight schedules and many have been intimidate by the process of learning English or have found that they can function without it. For me that translates to different students in the classroom each time I teach. It’s kind of hard to lesson plan when you don’t know who’s going to be in your class or how many people will show up. Luckily, this plays on my strengths of being pretty free form with the ability to change a plan on a dime. Some days it’s just prettier than others.
Teaching these classes means that I have two days completely off but it also means that I teach two evenings a week. We’re all still adjusting to the schedule.
What’s weird is that while I was working a 40-hour week job, I longed for something less rigid. My greatest days were the weeks that I was able to train. There was more flexibility. On many other days it felt like I was just showing up roll call so that I would be marked a present. Much of the work that I actually did on those days I could have done from anywhere and I probably would have been more productive. But there would never be any of “that tele-commuting” there. But of course there was the security of having a full-time job with lots great benefits and of getting a nice pay check every week. So, there’s that?!

Fall

I’ve been kind of obsessed with foliage this Fall. Well foliage and thinking about Storrs. It’s hard to believe that we moved back to Storrs for good 7 years ago. In some ways it was an easy decision to move back and in some ways it was a hard decision. When we first moved up to Vermont we thought this was the move, that we’d live in Vermont forever and that’s where our life as a family would begin and end. Well, a year later the reality was that Vermont’s economy had little to offer us so we would need to move. We looked for jobs in Boston and the Storrs area. Our thought was the first person to get a decent job would determine where we’d live. Problem was that neither of us had job by the time we needed to move. This is the point where stright up economics played a huge role in our decision. If we moved to Storrs, we could live with my parents while we found jobs. If we moved to Boston we’d be going into hoc to pay for rent etc. while we looked for jobs. We went with the financially wiser decision.

When we first moved back I struggled with my identity here in Storrs. This was the third time I’d come back and this was permanent move. I felt like I needed to justify or defend why I’d moved back. It was as if coming home to Storrs to live was some sort of defeat. As if I’d lost out there in the big wide world. Truth is that no one was saying these things to me, and it was just me wrestling with my own insecurities about moving back to Storrs. I’d had to wrestle the same feeling when I decided to attend UCONN. I remember talking with John Hodgson about it one day shortly after we’d moved back and him saying you’re not the same person and it’s not the same town. He was so right. I was not the same person and Storrs is not the same town to the me I am now.

In the end moving back to Storrs was one the best stumbled into decisions we ever made. For me, it’s really wonderful to drive the streets of my youth with a totally different perspective on the streets. I like living in a place I have so much history with. I love that my mom can run out and pick up the kids in an emergency. I love that the kids participate in some of the same activities that I did. I don’t always love running into people I’ve known at the grocery store, but it’s great to know it happens (too much really.) I love the look on people’s faces when they meet “Sarah Curtis” and then ask “Do I know you>” and I say “I’m Sarah Cook”. These are important things.

So with that said here’s some of the beauty of Storrs I’ve been enjoying this week.

Miscellany
I rarely drive by this Chucky’s let alone stop at it, but this week I got gas there. As I stood looking at the building, my thoughts went back to high school.

I think only M. Colyn and Jennie-Ho will understand specifically the night and why I was thinking about parties, booze, Bugles and parking lot puking.

So this pictures is dedicated to two really great friends.

Lifecasting, it’s all the rage

I’d love to say we never go to McDonald’s, but we do. I documented the most recent trip using my Flip Mino. It’s so awesome and I’m in love. Get ready for more Lifecasting in all it’s wondrous glory.